Falsely accused men are victims of real abuse

Fathers falsely accused of child abuse are a rapidly growing population. The National Center for Child Abuse and Neglect reports 3.5 million cases of alleged child abuse in 1998, with 1 million of these confirmed. But 71 percent of the accusations were unfounded and false. (Dean Tong, 2002).

One can only imagine the horror that a man goes through when a child he dearly loves betrays him.

Not only does he have a losing battle with a twisted court system rubber-stamping the zealous actions of the child-protective-service agency, he can never prove his innocence to the most important people in his life. Never knowing what his friends and family really think is the worst part of all.

The process goes on endlessly. Not only is the threat of jail hanging over his head, but his family is destroyed. The child inventing the lies, usually in collusion with the mother, becomes only a pawn--also a victim, a weapon against a hated husband.

A great proportion of the false allegations are created by runaway teens, especially when they are running from juvenile court, not the father at all. When finally picked up by the police, they claim they ran away because they were being sexually abused by their father. Their accounts are not only detailed but disgusting, extremely graphic, and very well rehearsed, with the help of other runaways.

In most cases the teen has been further coached by Mother, who has her own stake in the outcome; that is, custody plus the cruelest possible punishment of the father. Often the child, the mother, or both are sociopathic liars hell-bent on getting their way.

The biggest problem is that there is rarely any evidence to disprove. So what defense does the falsely accused have? Dean Tong, author of Elusive Innocence: Survival Guide for the Falsely Accused (2002), is one of the nation’s best experts on how a man can win his case. When writing this book, he asked me to contribute an appendix of questions that a defense attorney can ask during a deposition of the accusing child.

These interrogatories are so thorough and strong that I truly doubt that any lying teen could stand up against them. I urge most strongly that any defendant, if innocent, insist--and I mean demand--that his attorney ask the child every single question. Most of them are listed below. The full set is included as Appendix I in Tong’s book.

Defense Interrogatories for False Accusers

1. Name all persons who have prepared you to answer questions during this session.
2. Before you ran away, did you have any intention of “getting even” with your father if he reported your absence to the police?
3. Did you disclose your plans to make up a story about your father to any of your friends?
4. How many interviewing sessions took place that dealt with accusations against your father?
5. Who conducted these interviews?
6. Did you take any tests?
7. How long did each interview last?
8. Did you take an oath to tell the truth when you were interviewed?
9. Who witnessed this oath?
10. Was a family history obtained from your mother?
11. Have you ever been sexually active with any boy or girl?
12. At what age was your first sexual experience with a boy or girl?
13. Were you ever reluctant about accusing your father?
14. Is there any benefit to you if you stick to your accusation?
15. When you made these accusations against your father, were you angry at him for other reasons?
16. If you were angry at him, why?
17. Were you angry at your mother?
18. Why were you angry at your mother?
19. When your mother took you to stay with your father, did you feel this was punishment or rejection? (Some mothers will purposely place the child in the father’s care to provide a time-frame for alleged abuse.)
20. Why did you wait until your final runaway before accusing your father? Why not the first time you ran away?
21. Why did you not tell your therapist or your school counselor that your father molested you?
22. Why did you not tell your pastor or any other family member?
23. If your father really molested you, why didn’t you warn your brother(s) and sister(s)?
24. What reasons can you think of that your father would take you to a counselor and a priest, and encouraged you to stay with family members and friends when you could tell any one of them that he molested you?
25. Describe in detail your memory of your father molesting you. Include the place and room, what you were wearing, what you were doing right before, what time of day it was, what he said, what you said, where he touched you and for how long, whether there was pain, how you felt, whether there was discharge or blood, whether you cried, whether you begged him to stop, and any other details that you remember. I will repeat each of these one at a time and give you time to think before you answer.
26. Please describe your most horrible memory of being abused?
27. Do you suffer from flashbacks (explain), night sweats, or nightmares due to the abuse?
28. What do you see in your nightmares and flashbacks, and how do you feel?
29. If you told your counselor other things before you ran away, why didn’t you mention the abuse?
30. Have you even made any complaints to anyone about these matters, and what did you say?
31. Do you have any friends who have made similar accusations about a parent?
32. Please name other people you have had sex with, and whether they were children, teens, or adults.
33. Do you understand that any adult who had sex with you, or sheltered you while considered a runaway will be prosecuted as a criminal?
34. You were willing to accuse your father. Are you willing to name anybody in the last question? I’ll repeat it.
35. Was anyone who sheltered you a drug dealer? Anyone into “kiddie porn”?
36. Where can we find the people in the last question?
37. Do you know that lying in an interview like this one, under oath, is a crime in itself?
38. Has anyone told you what perjury is and what the penalty is?
39. Do you think your mother will benefit if your father is punished?
40. When you were still a runaway, whom did you tell about your father? How can we reach this person or these people?
41. Can you contact the people you were with during your runaway and ask them to come in?
42. If you know, please name the classification that your accusation was placed in. I’ll explain each as I name them. They are:
Credible disclosure--suspicion of abuse supported.
Credible non-disclosure--no or low index of suspicion remains.
Non-credible disclosure--evidence of coaching or other factors decreases, or removes suspicion of abuse.
Unclear--high index of suspicion remains, but no disclosure or problematic disclosure exists.
43. Do you feel your mother has added credibility to your accusations against your father, and if so, how?
44. What kinds of accusations has your mother made about your father to other members of the family?
45. What have you purposely not told me?

The above article is submitted courtesy of St. James the Elder Theological Seminary online, at http://stjamestheelderseminary.org/, Fr. Heyward B. Ewart, III, Ph.D., President. Fr. Ewart is a diplomate of the American College of Forensic Examiners and author of the book: "AM I BAD? Recovering from Abuse" (Loving Healing Press)